i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
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