you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
