we're chasing vodka with high fives
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
