Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
