cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
soo... how was my night?
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
