i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
