Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
