when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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