My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Randomize
