I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
