so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
