We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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