If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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