Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Omg I joined a choir last night...
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
