I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Randomize
