This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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