My first STD was from a foam party
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
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