Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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