okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
