I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Randomize
