that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
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