Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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