this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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