i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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