i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
