haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
