We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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