That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
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