i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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