Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
