We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
