I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
