I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
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