The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
