she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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