So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I've blown a few things in my day
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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