i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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