Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Randomize
