In the future we'll all be gay
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
this is an emotional support booty call
Randomize