I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Randomize
