So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
