im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
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