i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
