Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
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