I can feel you judging me through the phone.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
