you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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