You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
