trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
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