pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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