chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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