You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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