I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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